Posts Tagged ‘ Tea ’

A half-life.


I wake with a terrible hangover, a splintering headache, a strong sense of regret, embarassment and an awkward feeling in my stomach that I can’t seem to shift.


Unsettled glances across the living room.

“I’ll see you after work.”

The door slams shut. Bloody thing’s always slammed nomatter how gently I try to close it. The people below must hate me.

Back to sleep.


Start. All Programs. Steam.

Username: Cohaagen
Password: ******

Half-Life 2, starred, Metascore: 96.

Right-click. Launch Half-Life 2.


Stomach is paining me. Time to put the kettle on. Food: a luxury I can scarcely afford.

Or can I?



Bookmarks. Personal. Online Banking.

Balance: -£1,650.00
Available Balance: £0.00

No. No I can’t.

Earl Grey again. The bergamot makes my stomach churn and my brain tick over. It’s all I have. Back to my desk, Gordon Freeman’s right hand bobs from left to right. The tea is lukewarm now. I gulp it down. The longer it stays in my mouth the worse it tastes.

My stomach groans.


A phonecall.


A second phonecall. My heart has sunk. Back to sleep.


Tab. Hibernate Computer. Space.


That was the worst day.

I tried playing Half-Life 2 again today. I couldn’t last for any longer than fifteen minutes. It was too much.

Far too much.


This ain’t no grapevine.

So.  I went and decided to make myself a wordpress blog.  Granted, it’s not the kind I eventually hope to band about the Internet.  No.  At some point this year I shall endeavour to stop being lazy and program, host and be responsible for every aspect of my own webpage without the help of WordPress or any other type of CMS for that matter.  I have decided that there are no themes I enjoy looking at and, therefore, no themes that anyone else will enjoy looking at.  This;

1.  Saddens and distresses me to the point where I feel like either / or:
1a.  Giving up altogether,
1b.  Opening photoshop and just bally well getting on with it.

2.  Makes me think that not very many people care about wordpress themes and, as a result of boring things to look at, the text will become the most important thing to look at.

Point two is almost certainly not invalid.  Web 2.0 has taken the Internet and made it something pretty to look at as opposed to being what it actually is; a research tool, a means of communication and a multimedia platform.  Websites such as are a perfect example of the sort of nonsense I am against.  Badly designed, laid out and intrusive Flash has been taken and forced into the mouths of the consumer as a viable example of what the Internet should look like.  It’s not that I’m against animation and interaction – on the contrary.  However when it’s done badly my goat gains levitation, and I want to throw things at my monitor.

And so, I have gone for the whitest (careful…), most boring theme I could find that comprises of two colums and has support for Widgets.  I don’t know what I’ll use them for, but that’s only because I haven’t bothered to find out what they can do yet.  As a result of my intention to research said widgets, the more of these widgets you see, the more useful they will become.

Enough of this nonsense.

I need tea.

NOTE:  MAD props to and Ryan north.  I hope you don’t mind, but I edited the first two panels for completely non-profit purposes.  I do apologise if I made you angry…